Most friendships are fleeting.
Looking at my life/ high-school experiences in retrospect, there were points when I wholeheartedly believed that the people who held significant value to me, would remain in my life forever. But I’ve come to realize that turning these reveries into reality is oddly taxing. Somehow, up until now I’d managed to turn a blind eye to the blatantly obvious reality that I was drifting from most of high-school friends & acquaintances… however, when I do make a point to see these old friends, I often find our conversations to be quite dull in comparison to those in the past and I don’t enjoy my interactions old friends, anymore.
Frankly I didn’t understand why I felt this way – and I grew increasingly apprehensive of the idea that the same thing would happen again a few years from now – except with my college friends. But after doing some thinking, I’ve come to a personal consensus about a few things. Since graduating, some of my high-school friends have gotten into relationships, began working, and have had to manage a completely separate life of their own – and because we were/are still young, all of these sudden changes come off as more challenging and sudden than they are when they occur later in life – prompting people to either become closer with or fully drift from friends (more often the latter seems to be true, especially for people who realize they need to work on themselves and evolve as a person to yield a strong future). While people go through these same things (and more) in college, I’ve noticed that people tend to actually open up to others more/ find a greater appreciation for friends when they go through both trivial and large life changes in college – in comparison to when in highschool – and I think the sense of maturity that comes along with aging, is a large player in that occuring. Additionally, Highschool is an extremely sensitive and often excessively emotionally draining time for individuals – so it probably make sense that students who had a brutal high-school experience (like myself at times), might want to leave everything that is highschool, in the past. On another note, some friends of mine currently attend Community College, while others attend Universities – & it’s not that where you go to school diminishes the quality, importance or merit of a person, but rather these things certainly play significant roles in the drifting process. This process is further catalyzed by fact that highschoolers, myself included, tend to not know what they even want out of friendships, until they’ve begun their college experience. And as bad as this sounds, all this makes me think that maybe I gave extra importance to high-school friendships, just to have a way to pass time.
But now, after having completed one year of college, I do know what I want.
For one, because of the generous amount of freedom given to students, and the lack of a stringent, uniform schedule – the people you interact with, are not merely there for passing time but more often than not are people you enjoy the company of. They are the people you see at 2 in the morning after walking down the hall from your dorm room to theirs, and the people you talk to while walking from class, to lunch, to the library with every other day. And they are usually the people who have matured in the same way that you have. As people grow up, a larger value is placed on time – giving even MORE reason to not while away time with people who are just not worth it – which means people actually look for qualities in forever friends (like loyalty, drive, value for others, etc.) rather than people who kinda just, well, exist besides them. And now that I have these forever friends, I’m confident that I won’t ever write an article titled, “Post-college friends VS. college friends.” (:
- August 21, 2017 @ 20:55:06 [Current Revision] by Rhea
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